On a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the worst, I am rating tonight a good night for me being able to deal with being by myself. What has changed…Nothing…AT ALL!

I figured I have been at home for two hours by myself with myself. In my own company. I spoke with my daughter, received bad news about her dumb father, my ex, and how he is being so d-u-m-b about handling the divorce that could devastate my pension and wipe me out, and this should make my night horrible.

Hmmm So why am I taking my evening in stride tonight? I don’t know. Ladies of America..single ladies, divorced ladies, dumped ladies, hurting ladies that don’t want to be alone, guess what? There is light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe it will be for one night out of 10 and then it will go back to a bad night and then it will be two good nights and then it will be some bad but does this mean it is getting better. Damn I hope so! But I leave you. I think I did well. I stayed up 2 hours today by myself, with myself and was not depressed. So now I prep myself for sleep and hope I don’t have an Edgar Allan Poe night or a I’m a Lost Little Girl night and I will sleep good tonight. See ya’ll in the morning!!


  1. addercatter says:

    This gives me hope. Thank you. Kat


    1. I am waking up feeling the same my beautiful addercatter feeling the same, like I say, I may feel blue for a week after this, but I was good last night, I am wearing my duckie jammies and feeling happy…Yeah!!!


  2. Solving Maria says:

    Yes, I’m looking forward to see that light. Thank you for giving us hope.


    1. Please please let us all pray for that light to stay lit…shall we call it a night light?
      bless you Maria


  3. janineyork says:

    Sweet dreams. It gets better and some worse too, but mostly better when we control our own happiness. 🙂


    1. Oh Janine, I think I was in a shock for these first 5 months dancing around feeling like a superwoman and then it was what the hell are these wet things coming out of my eyes at night? Why is my lips curling down at the corners, why am I feeling down and anxious, I had bottled up my feelings so much and guess what you can’t run away, it comes at you whether you like it or not and its better to face the feelings then and get them over with then have them knock you down when you least expect them, but I am learning.


  4. dadstartingover says:

    Really great blog!


    1. I always forget that men read my blogs too! I love it! I forget that men share the same struggles, how dumb am I to feel that it is only women that go through this. Because I feel that the weaker sex is the only one that gets this, that men are stronger that lucky them, they get to not feel. Duh, wake up Catalina. Thank you for reading and waking me up!!


  5. Kira says:

    Yeah for that good night! Night time is always hard for me. So, I can relate to your EAP and LLG nights. Some nights I do well and others not so much. I hope you have plenty of more nights like this!


    1. Me too!!! I have had lots of encouragement when it comes to nights…Wow this is a sore subject to many women out there…good topic!!


      1. Kira says:

        You are right, it is a tough topic for many women. I’m glad that you brought it up! It sounds like you are having a good week…I’m glad to read that!


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