Some areas I have not tapped into working on. Some areas are still scary and hurt. It is scarier and more painful than abuse to me.
I don’t think about it. I don’t discuss it. I don’t even want to delve into it. I tell myself I trust all until you give me a reason to not trust, then the dagger would be so deep once again to my soul, and to who I am. I would claim defeat and walk away. Keep him, he is not worth it.
I have grown from the cruel betrayal I have experienced and no man is worth it. If he could nonchalantly put his wiener in someone and claim he loves me? Then he has love I don’t want. Any guy I date will get a clear picture of what I put up with and what I don’t from now on.
So trust? I push it out of my mind and pretend it isn’t an issue with me, but if you betray me, my back will go to you, and you will be the stranger I never knew.