Why Dating Right After A Break-Up Is All Bad!


Divorce is easy…so I thought!

Barely even hurt..so I thought!

I thought I was the divorce guru.  My hubby of almost 30 YEARS dumped me.  Know what happened to me? I grabbed me a new boyfriend in Vegas and life was all about finding cute clothes and keeping in shape because every three weeks I was taking off to Vegas to see shows and play with my new man.

That will show that ex, huh? Especially if you too were dumped for another woman. How cool would it be for him to find out you too have moved on and got you a new man. Sounds like a plan, right? That’s how I was thinking. IN YOUR FACE! HA!

It wasn’t six months, the guy dumped me for some blonde bimbo. Dumped again. Not a problem, in between crying spells I signed up for online dating and omg, found the most amazing guy the next day. This was too easy. I left the guy a good riddance message because I was dating a homicide detective.

Two weeks later it was over. My depression grew worse and I only knew this guy a month. What was going on.

DATING RIGHT AFTER A BREAK-UP!

Why you ask.

  • I had to

I didn’t realize that my jumping into a relationship was like putting a cheap band-aid over my broken heart. I did not heal, I did not work on  Don’lhis boyfriend was just a band-aid to cover up what I didn’t want to feel for my husband anymore because he shut me out years ago.

Now I know why they tell you to wait before you start dating. You have to go through the pain and resolve it before you can fully give yourself to anyone else. You need to find your true self and reflect on what went wrong in your marriage. Mourn the death of your marriage.  That is one pain you cannot run from.
Not to mention I didn’t know how to be alone.  This time it is different, I mourned the death of my marriage and am enjoying this time to get to know me.

If there are any newly single people out there after a divorce, separation, I challenge you to stay single for 6 months at least.

I know there are some hot mama’s out there that are thinking no way, YES WAY! What have you got to lose. Maybe you will learn something about yourself.

The key though is not to see this as a punishment but a period to heal lovingly. A time to learn to sit with yourself.



 

What this is about is learning to be o.k. and at peace with yourself.  It is hard at first but you will get to the point where you will look forward to spending time with yourself.  We are amazing people, just so many of us have never peeled the layers to really get to know our true self.
Namaste

3 thoughts on “Why Dating Right After A Break-Up Is All Bad!

  1. I had a 7 year gap between 2nd and 3rd husband. I have been single now the longest since a teen! Divorced last time in 2006. Wow. 2 years sine boyfriend gone. Take care!

    Like

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