SINGLE WOMANS FIRST NIGHT IN BED!!!

MY FIRST NIGHT IN MY NEW BED!!!

Setting: Recently divorced, I have been sleeping on the floor for 4 months because I can’t afford to buy a bed. I have finally been able to get a bed. After all this time ,I have a bed now! I put my sheets on it and my comfy comforter and pulled the comforter back in an inviting way and took pictures of it and put it all over Facebook.

Now all my friends could see that I have accomplished my first big step as an “independent woman”, I bought a bed!

Bed: (softly) Hey.

Me: (looking around quickly) Who said that!

Bed: (still in a sultry deep manly voice, sounding just like Barry White!!!) It’s me, your bed.

Me: Say what! Beds don’t talk!

Bed: That’s besides the point. How long has it been for you?

Me: Excuse me?

Bed: Been separated for several months, no?

Me: Maybe, but I don’t think that is any of your business. I was doing fine, my blow up mattress was comfortable!

Bed: Ha! That thing was still wet behind the ears. Didn’t know anything about making a real woman comfortable at night. I can make all your dreams come true. That’s what I’m here for.

Me: Theres is no need to throw stones, it did just fine.

Bed: Did it now? I’m here because of you, so that tells me something.

Me: (turning a crimson red) uhm…

Bed: No need to be embarrassed baby, but I like you when you’re shy. (Voice turns husky) Close the door behind you…you look very uncomfortable in your work clothes…they need to come off … all off … come to bed baby …

Me: (Looking up quickly) On one condition, (then slowly looks down, wringing hands nervously) door stays open and bra and panties stay on…I don’t want you to think I’m too fast.

Bed: So be it. Come. I’m waiting.

Scene quickly goes to the following day as the sun has arisen and I am sitting up hair tosseled, smoking a cigarette, a small smirk on my face.

Bed: Someone looks well rested.

Me: (Biting my lower lip) You can say that.

Bed: I take it you are ….pleased…

Me: (turning out my cigarette then coyly running my finger across the sheets) you can say that too.

Bed: (Voice get a little lower and a little huskier) Aren’t you going to be late for work?

Out of the corner of my eye I see that my closet is a little open and a corner of my blow up mattress is peeking out…is that a tear I see running down the side of it. I walk over and slowly close the closet door.

Me: (quietly to the blow up mattress I whisper) I’m sorry.

Me: (I jump back into bed and throw the blankets over me) I’m ready for another nap!

Bed: Oh Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Starting Over After 50

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MY FIRST NIGHT IN MY NEW BED!!!

Setting: Recently divorced, I have been sleeping on the floor for 4 months because I can’t afford to buy a bed. I have finally been able to get a bed. After all this time ,I have a bed now! I put my sheets on it and my comfy comforter and pulled the comforter back in an inviting way and took pictures of it and put it all over Facebook.

Now all my friends could see that I have accomplished my first big step as an “independent woman”, I bought a bed!

Bed: (softly) Hey.

Me: (looking around quickly) Who said that!

Bed: (still in a sultry deep manly voice, sounding just like Barry White!!!) It’s me, your bed.

Me: Say what! Beds don’t talk!

Bed: That’s besides the point. How long has it been for you?

Me: Excuse me?

Bed: Been separated for…

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COME ON PAIN!!! I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU!!!!

Starting Over After 50

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COME ON PAIN!!! I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU!!!

In my life I have learned that you cannot make someone feel what you want them to feel for you.  I have also learned that when you don’t seem to get the message they can get mean and inhumane about you pursuing them.  Move on girls.  When they don’t want you they don’t want you.  Damn it hurts, but we have to cut that tie.  Just like that old cliche’ goes. They are just not into us anymore…

I used to wonder why was I given such a horrible man who causes me so much pain.  I am such a good loving wife.  I would follow him to the ends of the Earth.  No one will love him like I do, why does he hurt me so.  I endured this pain for 29 years and I am not going to lie…

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