If there would be a law, should it be parenting with depression is prohibited? A child looks at their parents for modeling, for motivation. They have prohibited gay people from adopting, yet wouldn’t two loving happy people parent better than a mother who often could not get out of bed, who couldn’t find the energy to get out of her pajamas and brush her hair.
I am ashamed to call myself a mother. How dare I bring innocent lives and drag them into a world full of darkness and self-loathing. I can recall going to my 7 year olds’ back to school night and her telling me if I could smile and not act like a robot. To this day my daughter wants nothing to do with me because I am not someone to be proud of. This makes me beyond sad, because through it all, my kids made me try when I felt like throwing in the towel.
Do you know what being a mom with depression is like? Imagine a regular mom, can you ever not have guilt about something…wished you read to them a little longer, wished you played with them a little longer…As mothers we are never satisfied with our performance because this is one job we can’t screw up, it is a God given job. Imagine being a mom with depression, not only do you have the guilt of how you should have been better, you have everyone telling you what a shitty job you did as a mother, especially the ones you love more than anything … your kids.
The cries for help are discusting because we are supposed to be someone to look up to but instead we are discusted to even look in a mirror.
The want to leave this earth sounds like heaven.