NIGHTS ARE GETTING BETTER!!!

THE NIGHTS ARE GETTING BETTER On a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the worst, I am rating tonight a good night for me being able to deal with being by myself. What has changed…Nothing…AT ALL! I figured I have been at home for two hours by myself with myself. In my own company.Continue reading “NIGHTS ARE GETTING BETTER!!!”

LONELY PEOPLE

COMBATTING LONELINESS DAY 1 Goal was to become visit people, meet people, go around people. In other words stop being a wah wah all by myself at home and be social. I could do that…me social butterfly…I can do that. I went to my mother and visited. I had a good time. So good IContinue reading “LONELY PEOPLE”

No One There To Care….

No One There To Care I hug my blankie for comfort It helps me feel safe and secure As I lay in bed I see my silhouette The side of my head up against the wall It reminds me of a small child Early in the morning yet still dark in the night I feelContinue reading “No One There To Care….”

WILL I GO CRAZY???

WILL I GO CRAZY??? Here is food for thought…If learning to be alone is so great, cause you know I have been feeling lonely and depressed, being in my apartment alone at night. Everyone says it is good for me..I will get to know myself.. Relish in the solitude, you will get to love theContinue reading “WILL I GO CRAZY???”

JUST THERE!

JUST THERE… I came home last night and went to bed by 5:15 p.m. Why? I know why…So I don’t have to face the night alone…not good. Ok new game plan. I need to revamp myself…this going wah-wah is not good for my rise to fame. I have to do something thing different. I haveContinue reading “JUST THERE!”

WHY DO I KEEP FALLING!!!

WHY DO I KEEP FALLING!!! It’s been 6 months since the departure from my married household and I think I am doing good and then feelings of anger come bubbling up again. They wake me up, I get the urge to call him and tell him off, but I know that contacting him will justContinue reading “WHY DO I KEEP FALLING!!!”

MAYBE I’M READY TO THINK ABOUT MEN

MAYBE I WANT TO THINK OF A MAN NOW I am well aware of the new thoughts of the nowadays…it is not about finding happiness in a man, don’t look for love until you learn to love yourself…yeah yeah yeah…I know all about that song and dance. I think I wrote that book, or atContinue reading “MAYBE I’M READY TO THINK ABOUT MEN”

MONEY IS BECOMING A NIGHTMARE!!!

MONEYS IS BECOMING A NIGHTMARE I am a worrier by nature, before where I used to voice and nag my worries to my partner just to somehow maybe have them appeased or ignored but at least get them vented now I hold them in. I don’t want to worry my daughter that I worry monthContinue reading “MONEY IS BECOMING A NIGHTMARE!!!”

DEALING WITH THE LONELINESS…

Dealing with The Loneliness I grew up in a large Hispanic family with wall to wall kids. That is why everyone should always have more than one child because then you always have a friend. I always had lots of friends. I had my siblings and we would go to my relatives house and ofContinue reading “DEALING WITH THE LONELINESS…”