Spying On Your Ex Man!!! 3.15.13

Imagine if you will, a woman wearing an all-black cat suit, hair pulled back tight in a long pony tail. She is prowling in the late night…the music to mission impossible is playing in the background. She jumps crawls out the window of a tall building and creeps up to another window and secretly comes to a room where a man is caressing the face of another woman. The lady in black takes out a pen that turns out to be a camera and starts taking pictures of this secret rendezvous. Then pulls out a tiny cone like device and points it towards the window. There she is able to hear the entire conversation, “Oh yes my darling Matilda, it was you all along, I have put away millions of dollars away from my wife and children so I can run away with you and we can live in the Bahamas forever…”

People don’t call me drama mama for nothing…you love the drama don’t you! Uh yeah but that is besides the point I always say…

Do you spy on your ex? I did. We are doing it in two pieces here. There are two reasons to spy on your ex:

1. You want to find out the the mo fo is screwing around and you want to find out who the dirty ho is!
2. You have a stinkin’ suspicion he really is holding out on you, financially. You know or have a stinkin’ suspicion he really did have an affair and did you wrong and there is proof to be had… AND
DAMMIT YOU WANT SOME JUSTICE HERE!!!

Guess what kids…It’s  “Catalina’s, Oh My God You Went Through That…Life” story time!!!! Yay!!!!! Now kids, this is not a fairy tale, it a true story, but gather round…Once upon a time a lady name Catalina was having an awful hard time with her hubby coming home at night and she would wonder where the hell is that sorry sap at night! So she knew he always had his beers in the garage with his friends at night when he did come home. So she put a voice activated recorder in there and waited patiently. Now this took a month but one night her, not so charming hubby went into the garage with his buddy and Catalina made sure he knew she was far away and even went to her mama’s house. That next morning she retrieved that recorder and this is what she heard…

“…yeah she is so stupid she don’t even know I put her phone number under my bosses name so she will never find it…” So guess what Catalina did. That night when her hubby was asleep she went into his wallet and got the bosses phone number then the following day called the number pretending the be the health department stating that …and yes I knew her full name…had been exposed with Gonorrhea by a (insert my hubby’s name here) and she needed to be tested immediately. The only thing stupid about me was that I stayed after that.

So obviously my reason was number 1. So is that your reason? We are assuming that you are separated, so why do you want to know, I guess if it is like a cousin or sister or friend or someone that is betraying you then yeah it is a good thing. But let’s me. I found out. Wow I was really big and bad huh, had one over him huh! Really? I stayed with him!!! What it really showed him is that he could cheat on me and get away with it! I was a woman that allowed a man to cheat on her and it was ok. My actions showed this so what was the use of my spying…it was of no good. I was better off being stupid and never knowing anything because then I really wouldn’t have looked AS stupid! I thought I was showing him, HE SHOWED ME! So if you are still in a relationship and are thinking of spying, think twice, what are you going to do with that info sister.

Next we go to reason #2. Maybe you are going through a divorce and you want it to help out your case. You need to be careful here, there are laws out there that could protect him. Are there any restraining orders against you…Now, now I am not assuming that you have them. I have done some crazy wife things and got real close to getting one…you know stabbing the car wheel with an ice pick…so if you have one I am not throwing stones. I am as real as they come. We hold no secrets here and there is no shame here either. I never pretend be anything I am not. As Popeye says, I yam what I yam and that’s all that I yam. So girlie be real careful out there, if you have any restraining orders I suggest you get a hobby or a boyfriend or duct tape yourself to your apartment because you do not deserve to get yourself into any trouble.

Spying that is legal is if you have proof that he has been carrying on with another woman, spending both of your monies on another woman and used your home computer to chit chat with her AND YOU ARE ABLE TO ACCESS HIS CONVERSATION WITHOUT A PASSWORD!!!

I heard of a case where a woman put a GPS system in their family vehicle and since he was driving on public streets and she was able to track him going to his mistress’ place, she was able to use this in court.
Check with your attorney, if you have other proof, you may be onto something, because sometimes once it is on public display, an email could be admissible in court. Always consult your attorney beforehand.

If this is an obsession, you just can’t stop. You think he might be seeing someone now. You just gotta see what he is doing. You are driving by his place a million times in the middle of the night…stuff like that. Yah…you need to talk someone….I know that doesn’t feel good and the more you do it the more you want to do it. It is like a drug, you need to do it, you can’t stop. Stopping cold turkey is the only way to do it…contact CODA…Codependents Anonymous if you feel you really need help with this issue. Nothing to be ashamed of. You can google it.

I read on someone’s Face Book and it happened to be a guy so I bet he was a victim, but it said, a jealous woman is better than any spy in the FBI….Oh how true that it!